Wedding Redo – What I’d Change About My Wedding

I've been married nearly a decade. Don't ask me where the time went. Somewhere between a move to Hawaii, a switch in careers, a baby, and a new house (more details coming soon!) - somehow we have created this beautiful little life together. And it has been ten years. As we get closer to our ten year wedding anniversary, I can't help but think about what my wedding redo would look like.

If you're a bride that got married before the Pinterest era, I'm talking to you too.

In an attempt to help my Maui brides, I thought I would write this little article detailing what I'd change about my wedding if I did a wedding redo.


1. LESS GUESTS, MORE QUALITY TIME

Brace yourselves: I had 200 people at my wedding. We had distant family, cousins I've only met once, my parents' friends that remember when I was born, and a bunch of other people I wouldn't consider close attend our wedding in 2009. I mean - how many of them really knew Anthony and me? There were some people at the wedding that I really wanted to spend time with, but was unable to because our ENTIRE TIME was spent mingling from table to table. We had zero quality time with our guests.

If I could do it again, I would have 50-75 people, which is just enough to spend quality time with but also have an awesome dance party! And if I got married again (same guy though, of course), we'd have one HELL of a dance party!

2. OPT FOR A DESTINATION WEDDING

This one kind of ties into the last one. If I'm being honest, I probably wouldn't have had a Maui wedding. As lovely as that would have been, it wasn't in the budget for us.

Instead, I probably would have done a semi-destination wedding on the shores of Lake Michigan (and would NOT have gotten married in February! haha). Beautiful location, removed from my usual day-to-day surroundings - I think this would have fit Anthony and I very well. By doing a destination wedding you get more time with your out of town guests and you get to experience a new place together! It also helps lean-out your guest list as not everyone wants to travel!

Also, your pictures are going to be way more epic in a cool location than if you tie the knot in your own backyard #justsayin

3. FAKE EYELASHES

Yeah, yeah, you probably didn't see that one coming. But fake eyelashes are my JAM. Every time I get a photoshoot done now it's a no-brainer. They make your eyes stand out more and just give that air of elegance to your photos. They don't have to be dragqueen-esqe. Sephora sells some lashes that are really natural looking and have the same effect!

candid maui wedding photographers

4. HAVE A SECOND PHOTOGRAPHER

You didn't think I'd write an informational article about my wedding redo and not include something about my wedding photographer - did ya?!

Here's the thing - and it's about to get heavy: my aunt and Godmother passed away 2 weeks to the day of my wedding. My wedding was her swan song. She watched me marry the love of my life, she danced with my husband, got into the  photobooth, and had a great time.

When she passed, I reached out to my photographer and begged to see images of my Aunt Susie. She sent me what she had - and there weren't any shots of her face. None. We even went through the RAW files together. Nothing. It was devastating.

And because I had SO MANY PEOPLE at my wedding, I didn't get to spend time with her. I hugged her. Told her I loved her. But I didn't get to soak it in.

And if I had a single picture with Aunt Susie on my wedding day, I would have cherished it for the rest of my life.

I'm so thankful we had the photobooth so I have those images of her.

Let me be clear: I don't blame the photographer. Not one bit. My photographer a great job covering what she could - but with a wedding of over 200 people it would have been impossible for her to document every.single.person.

Below: the only picture of my Aunt Susie from my wedding day.

If that doesn't hit you right in the feels, I'm not sure what will.

Get a second photographer for your day. You may regret it if you don't.

5. DROP MORE MONEY ON MY VIDEOGRAPHER

Videography was a last minute decision for us - as it is for most clients. GUYS. YOU WANT A VIDEOGRAPHER. Seeing the way your dad walked you down the aisle or the way your husband brushes the hair from your face. All of those little things - you'll forget them as time goes on.

Our videographers actually interviewed our grandparents. We didn't know they did this, but holy smokes it's important now that they've all passed. I can hear their voices and see them when they were doing well. I'm actually misty as I'm typing this. We miss our grandparents dearly, and I'm happy we have those interviews to share with our daughter some day. It truly is priceless.

So - yes - we got a videographer. But it was a budget videographer. And you can tell (you know - you get what you pay for!). So instead of dropping mad cash on your place settings and flowers, INVEST in memories.

Invest in things that will become MORE valuable years after your wedding is over.

Because moments like the ones below are amazing in photographs, but a video really helps tell the whole story.

bride wiping tears during vows


I could nit-pick and go on about how our cake had random ferns coming off of it or that I was probably too much of a push-over when it came to what I wanted from my wedding, but I'll leave it here.

I hope that my brides and other brides out there will get some value from these wedding redos of mine!

And hey - if you're looking for a Maui Photographer to capture your wedding - let's chat!

2 Comments

  1. Tammy Tanaka

    Perfect post, really (except you’re missing an “is” in your last subtitle–just telling you because everything in here really is perfect, so I thought you’d like to know). And I totally agree with the smaller wedding idea. I ended up having about 400 people at my wedding because things got out of hand (a.k.a. I got tired of dealing with my mom and just told her to invite whomever she wanted). In hindsight, I really wish I had had a much smaller wedding and spent more quality time with people, especially those who came from far to see us. I do regret that. And the only thing I would add to your list is that I would have had a smaller wedding party, too. We had four bridesmaids and four groomsmen, but I really think just one or two each would have worked out better for us. And lastly, as someone who did have a second photographer–thank you to my photographer for suggesting one–I am so thankful for the moments they captured of our family and friends.

    Reply
  2. Katie

    Aww Ang. I got all the feels thinking of your wedding and all the events leading up to that day. I am so thankful I got to share that day with you both. It has been amazing to see how far you both have come since that day!

    Reply

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